Oooops, President Urkel ‘Did It Again.’

Did I do that? Jaleel White used to nasally intone regaled in all his Steve Urkel finery.

The tall, skinny, nerdy–yet genius, awful at sports black kid, sporting the big square, thick glasses, the suspenders holding up the too short ‘flood’ pants…oh the look, the geekiness of it all…young Mr. White played into iconic stature. But…who knew that in Hawaii* there had been another nerdy, geeky, purported genius,** tall skinny black kid (substitute wildly inappropriate surfer teeshirts for the ABC sitcom supplied Urkel sweaters) who would ALSO come to lead a half hour like, laugh tracked existance in a ‘mythical’ Chicago setting as well.

Barrack Obama IS Urkel…all grown up. Just like Steve Urkel had an odd almost stalkerish, approval seeking attraction to the neighboring Winslow family; Barky has an odd, dysfunctional, attention seeking attraction to all things pop/counter culture starting with his attraction to the Ayers family (in his Second City neighborhood). Bill and Bernadette WERE his Winslows; they even helped him morph (like the nerdy Steve Urkel into the cool, smack talking Stefan Urkelle during the fifth–and what does THAT say about our country??? Five years of that crap–season of Family Matters ) from Barry Soetaro, kid from…ahhh, someplace officially undocumented, to someone named Barrack (omit middle name) Obama.

The powers that were at ABC Family could not have dreamed a better plot outline. And instead of a whiny ‘did I do that?’ to the ensuing chaos ANY wannabe who really CAN’T interact properly causes, Barky got a Ayersism of ‘Hope and Change’ (in actuality, ‘Hoax and Chains’ but I guess its all in the local pronunciation).

But, like his make believe ‘intelligent’ counterpart…Duh Won can’t leave well enough alone. Ever.

Rather than just sit on the Hawaiian beachfront…watching the ‘workers’ decontaminate the raw sewage from Keihlani Bay, Barky decided to be all ‘Presidential’ and use his Top Secret(tm) Blackberry to…call Pootie about the START Treaty? Speak with John Boehner about his threats to repeal ObamaCare? Notify the EPA that Me!Chelle is overdoing the leg buttah again? Nah…instead the Leader…err, Reader (off TOTUS) decided to contact the owner of the NFL’s Philadelphia Eagles Jeffrey Lurie to CONGRATULATE HIM for ‘hiring’ Michael (watch your Beagle…he’s an Eagle) Vick.

Yep. THAT was important and pressing to Dear Leader (because obviously Duh Won is cleaning up with Vick as his Fantasy Team QB…beating them cabinet members who didn’t ‘respect da man Vick enuf to keep it real’ and select him. Don’t you just KNOW that Hillary selected Tom Brady for her QB…it explains, if nothing else, her recent hair style choices). Barky also took the time to be Super DeDuper ‘Green’ and ‘applaud’ Lurie for using tax abatements to put windmills and solar panels around Lincoln Financial Field by next season. Yes…the lights and concession stand energy draws will ‘assisted’ by solar panels and windmills…during football season. In Philadelphia. That project will be ‘Obama charmed’ as well…just like…

The great Urkel like success generated by a gratitious ‘look at me, I keep it real’ phone call from the Poser in Chief about Michael Vick. Yes…Barky ‘you did that.’ Your ‘good karma’ just washed over the Iggles…as they lost 24-14 to the Minnesota Vikings at Lincoln Financial last night in the ‘after Blizzard’ Tuesday Night Game.

Note to successful pop culturites…’when Obama calls, disaster falls…’

______________________________________________________________________________________________________
*No actual, legally recognized proof of Hawaiian residency.

**No actual transcript from Occidental College; Columbia University; or Harvard Law School have EVER been presented. But it makes for a really sweet script.

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6 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Integrity1st
    Dec 30, 2010 @ 02:32:50

    Like. Especially the footnotes!

    Reply

  2. yomotley
    Dec 30, 2010 @ 03:59:18

    I. Love. This. President Urkel! Did I mention I love this? Genius. (You, the genius, not President Urkel!)

    Reply

  3. Ting
    Dec 30, 2010 @ 15:08:48

    Urkel he will be forever. Great, as usual, Mary.

    Reply

  4. sjand3kids
    Dec 30, 2010 @ 18:45:51

    Wonderful piece of writing Mary…I’m sure you also considered using the Jeffersons butt Wheezy was too nice to play mooch.
    Sara B

    Reply

  5. AFinch
    Dec 30, 2010 @ 20:58:57

    Brava, Brava!

    Reply

  6. Trackback: Honey Trail Redux

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